Feeling lost is uncomfortable #WeeklyNRG

The Weekly Debrief 

After ten wonderful but busy days with Mum and Dad in France, I came back to work on Tuesday feeling slightly like I didn’t know which way was up. It was not one big thing; it was lots of little things, all quietly adding up to the same realisation: I feel a little rudderless at the moment. 

I have been so busy in the doing that I had forgotten the power of having a clear goal, a focus and a sense of progress. I tend to achieve more when I know what I am working towards. Without that direction, even a very full diary can start to feel like movement without momentum. 

Two things have helped me name what is going on. The first is reading Ray Dalio’s Principles. Early in the book, he talks about setting goals and working out how to achieve what you want. It made me realise that I do not currently have a clear goal — perhaps because I have already achieved many of the things I previously focused on. 

The second has been watching one of my coaching clients work through some big questions about her future. She is approaching it systematically: asking herself the difficult questions, allowing space for honest answers, and working out what she wants next. Seeing that process in action has been both inspiring and a timely nudge to do the same myself. 

The Week Ahead 

So, this week is not about forcing an answer or setting a shiny new target simply because I think I should have one. It is about giving myself permission to stop, spend some time alone and work out what I genuinely want next. 

I will be using two simple coaching frameworks as a starting point. First, the Wheel of Life: looking at key areas such as work, health, relationships, personal growth, fun, finances and contribution, then rating where I am now and where I would like to be. It is a useful way to turn a vague sense of imbalance into a clearer picture of where attention might be needed. 

Then I will use Be–Do–Have. Rather than beginning with “What do I want to have?” or piling more onto the “to do” list, I am starting with: “Who do I want to be?” From there: what do I need to do consistently, and what might follow as a result? It is a helpful reframe when the instinct is to solve uncertainty by simply becoming busier. 

Lessons Learnt 

Feeling lost is uncomfortable — particularly for people who are used to being purposeful, energetic and good at making things happen. But perhaps it is not a failure of focus. Perhaps it is a useful moment of transition. 

This time, I do not think the next goal is about acquiring something material. I suspect it is more about bettering myself: education, experiences and meaningful engagement with other people. Those are the themes I am going to explore over the next few weeks, without pretending I already know exactly where they will lead. 

The lesson this week is simple: when you feel rudderless, do not just row harder. Pause long enough to check the map. Ask better questions. Decide who you want to be, what you want to contribute and what direction feels meaningful now — then let the goals emerge from there. 

Here’s to allowing ourselves a little space to get lost, reflect properly, and find the next source of #NRG. 

Question for you: When did you last stop long enough to ask whether your goals still reflect the life and work you want now?